Today’s NaPoWriMo prompt asked us to write a warning label for ourselves.
Read All Instructions Before Consuming
Keep out of reach of children.
Take with a grain of salt.
May cause stomach ulcers,
increased blood pressure, and
nausea. In rare instances, death has resulted.
Mix with alcohol for improved results.
Wash in warm water. Tumble dry low. Do not iron.
Store at room temperature. To avoid sweating, do not expose to excessive heat.
This product is known to the state of California to cause cancer in laboratory animals.
If an erection lasting longer than four hours results from reading this poetry, please seek medical help immediately.