Wielding The Ax (Day Six)

(Day six of NaPoWriMo.)

Wielding the Ax

When I first saw Mommie Dearest
I was just a kid of
12 or 13
who’d never seen a Joan Crawford film
whose clothes hung
mostly on cheap wire hangers
and I had little understanding of the
difference between memoir and reality
so Ms. Crawford looked batshit crazy
strapping the kids in bed
yelling Tina, bring me the ax!
in her bad makeup and
that gown with giant shoulder pads.

And while I would still concede
that her daughter’s story
if true
makes Joan a horrible human being
that if is a pretty big one
and maybe little Christina was bummed
about not getting any inheritance money
so she had to grind that ax before
taking it to Mommie Dearest.

If I laugh at this movie
with Faye Dunaway so far over the top
and dialogue so on the nose
and no sense of dramatic pacing
does it make me a bad person
or just a product of my own upbringing
where spanking wasn’t nearly as eerie
or monstrous as in this film but
a quick, matter-of-fact consequence
for disobedience and defiance?

Thank god I’m not famous
because no one will pay my kids
big money to expose every bad moment
from my parenting experience and
turn the tawdry tell-all into
a poorly executed camp classic
where all I ever do is yell and cry and
wear clothes that make me look
even more insane and threatening as I
chop down the rosebushes at midnight.



About semiblind

Bringing you stark existentialism since 1981.
This entry was posted in entertainment, family, fear, NaPoWriMo, poetry and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Wielding The Ax (Day Six)

  1. When your children write about you..the only horrors they will dredge up will be the ones you let your little girl watch on youtube when she was tiny and she will write about it with laughter.

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