Masturbatory (Day 23)

(Another day of NaPoWriMo.)


You can avoid all sugar
eat nothing but vegetables and fruits
exercise three hours a day
abstain from alcohol
meditate, do yoga
watch your salt intake
use SPF 50 sunscreen
get a regular physical
stay out of that part of town
wear your seatbelt
buy organic
practice preventative medicine
install a home security system
take your vitamins
brush after every meal
put on a bicycle helmet
train your entire family in CPR
carry pepper spray
engage in safe, monogamous sex
obey all traffic signs and signals
pray for health and longevity
never play contact sports
laugh at every opportunity
and never microwave your food.

A time will come when
you find yourself short of breath
with your heartbeat growing weak
and you will know at this instant that
you spent your entire life fighting
the unavoidable moment where
you don’t have the choice to be afraid
but only to surrender.



About semiblind

Bringing you stark existentialism since 1981.
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2 Responses to Masturbatory (Day 23)

  1. tina says:

    So if I don’t microwave my food can I through in some promiscuity and call it even?

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